Punography

I tried to catch some fog. I mist.

When chemists die, they barium.

Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a

seasoned veteran.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can

stop any time.

How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it

dawned on me.

The girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club,

but I never met herbivore

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.

I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on

words.

They told me I had type A blood, but it was a Type O.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.

Class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop

quiz.

Energizer Bunny arrested: Charged with battery.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A

thesaurus.

When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.

What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back four

seconds.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit

me!

Broken pencils are pointless.